This story is about how ignorance of local customs created a huge problem for us and got us nearly killed.
We had left high school and were awaiting our next adventure – maybe admission to the University, a job in Colombo, or even a ticket to the UK from a relative. That was when a few of us, Logan, Amarnath and few other classmates decided to take a trip to Keerimalai for a little R&R, to get away from the rigors and stresses associated with the uncertainties awaiting ahead in our lives!
We took the Chelliah family VW minibus to Keerimalai, driven by Ragu.
Upon arrival we walked along the beach, away from the Keerimalai hot spring pools and the little town, spotted a few fishing catamarans lined up neatly along the beach.
Amarnath came up with a bright idea and suggested that we take one of the catamarans for a joy ride. It seemed like a great idea, and no one in sight as far as one could see, and we had a consensus that we should proceed.
Then, one among us suggested, “guys, we cannot get our clothes all wet, let’s take off our clothes, leave it on the beach under a rock, and take the boat for a spin”. This wisdom seemed rational, and in the mindset of a typical aimless student, everyone stripped down and pushed the catamaran into the ocean.
After about an hour of drifting in the water, struggling to maneuver the boat ashore, we started heading towards the beach – and noticed, figures appearing on the beach, making a noise and shouting at us. Some of them screaming loud “get off the bow, get off the bow”. It took us a few minutes to realize that they were referring to the bow like wooden part of the catamaran, where Amarnath was perched up, pretending to be the coxswain in the whole operation. Later we learned that NOBODY sits on the bow, as it is “God’s seat” who protects the fisherman during their voyage into the deep ocean!
As the catamaran nearly hit the shore, we jumped out of the catamaran into the water and started to push it towards land. We could not do it with all our might. About four or five of the grown men in the crowd came into the water and helped us push the catamaran on the beach. Only then, they noticed that we were all stark naked!!
One of the smart asses quipped, “என்னடா உங்களிட்டை ஒரு கோவணம் கூட இல்லையா”? – (what you a**holes, don’t even have a loincloth)?
What was worse, our boat had drifted about a mile from where we started, where our clothes lay under a rock.
That was the longest mile we ever walked – it was truly a “walk of shame” with the children in the group, pointing fingers at us and giggling!
The mob (actually, the owners of the catamaran) were waiting with sticks and hammers to give us a thrashing!
We were spared the thrashing because of two saving graces:
One, the villagers thought, our humiliation in front of the crowd was sufficient punishment,
Second, one in the crowd recognized Logan as the soccer star who played for Maggona’s team.
Maggona was the Keerimalai village thug who earned his name “Maggona” – the high-security prison where they Incarcerated criminals in Sri Lanka. Maggona is the son of a woman named Viyali (வியாளி), who was the “Ma Barker” of Keerimalai. She, along with her son Maggona ran a protection racket – where all the shops operating in the vicinity would pay, protection money (Kappam). No one dared to cross her path!
Thanks to Logan, the soccer player in our midst – and one who occasionally played for Maggona’s team (a public service effort on the part of the village thug) – we were spared a beating.
The icing on the cake was, we were invited for a sumptuous meal, loaded with fresh fish crabs, shrimp, and cuttlefish.
